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Title: Humor/Job-Related - The 213 Things Skippy Is No Longer Allowed To Do In The U.S. Army An offbeat list of forbidden things to do in the military.
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Animal Kingdom Gone Wild

November 19th, 2008 by skippy So the other day I managed to find a new story that I just had to share with all of my regular readers. Australia has a problem.  And a serious one at that. Lesbian Koalas. Because I know that your brain is probably choking on that idea I will repeat it. Lesbian. Koalas. Before I go any further, take a moment to reflect on how unlikely you were to hear that particular phrase today. Also, lesbian koala is really fun to say. But it gets better.  It seems to that the lesbian behavior is triggered by being caged.  Sort of like a women behind bars flick on Cinemax.  Except with koalas. And when they go sapphic, they don't mess around.  They form big piles, sometimes up to five ... (Read More...) Posted in Skippy is a huge nerd | 2 Comments »

Fa la lala lala

November 18th, 2008 by Polkster I just got Boomerang, the classic cartoons channel, and it's sweet.  It's been so long since I've watched the Herculoids or Johnny Quest--the only thing the channel needs is more hardcore 80's/early 90's shows, like the Centurions and Pirates of Dark Water and Reboot. Which brings me to my next point: the Smurfs.  Oh man, I was watching the Smurfs--sober no less--and in some intense moment of clarity--like God was massaging my brain or something--I had this weird insight into Smurf sociology and biology.  You know what it was?  It was the presence of Sassette, the only other female Smurf that sparked this intense revelation.  Ignoring Smurfette, because she was artificially implanted into Smurf society by Gargamel, Sassette is the only ... (Read More...) Posted in Guest Story | 38 Comments »

Beauty and the Beast

November 17th, 2008 by Andrew Now when you read the title I'm sure you thought "Great, another Disney fanatic!" And you aren't wrong, but this isn't about a Disney film. This is about me and another soldier who just happens to have the best qualities of a red headed librarian, school teacher, Miss Universe and the super-hot naughty nun all wrapped into one cuddly little bundle. But first a little background. I used to be a highly competitive athlete. I was a swimming, diving, rock climbing, snow boarding, skate-boarding, biking and running machine. Unfortunately this meant that I also received a fair share of injuries from each sport. By the time I was twenty I had dislocated both my shoulders on no fewer that two hundred occasions, ... (Read More...) Posted in Andrew | 15 Comments »

Shelf Stacker Rules

November 16th, 2008 by skippy Here is a list of bad ideas from a UK co-op grocery store. (Submitted by Jason Cyrus) 1. Do not let customers hear you pointing out how retarded they are. This will get you reprimanded. 2. Even if they asked where to put the basket while standing 2 feet away from the pile of baskets. 3. Even if the boss agrees with your comments. 4. Do not undo the tops of twist top beer bottles to punish the anti-social alcoholics that enter, with stale beer. 5. Do not stash cash-checking pens in hiding places "Because the morons in the garden centre keep losing them." 6. Do not threaten to chop shoplifters hands off. 7. Do not threaten to put shoplifters in the ... (Read More...) Posted in New List | 16 Comments »

Fun with Intertubes

November 13th, 2008 by skippy See if you can find the item in here that is not like the others. ... (Read More...) Posted in Fun with internets | 9 Comments »

Viva Las Vegas!

November 12th, 2008 by LT Ronald Went off to Vegas last month, it was quite a blast, but I have come to realize that there is a new list of things that I am no longer allowed to do in Vegas. 1. Cannot hit on Kirsten Dunst. 2. Even if my girlfriend says "I'd fuck her". 3. Because her bodyguards are rude (she totally wanted it). 4. Kirsten Dunst's bodyguards don't care if what happens in Vegas Stays in Vegas. Cannot tell the people trying to hassle you to buy tickets on the streets: 5. No I would not like any, but here, have a hooker calling card. 6. I'm Samuel L. Jackson, do I look like I want to go to a motherfuckin' show, I AM the motherfuckin' show, motherfucka. 7. Do you know ... (Read More...) Posted in LT Ronald | 12 Comments »

It’s Veteran’s Day!

November 11th, 2008 by skippy And so I'm keeping my post light tonight, as I am spending the evening with Chinese takeout, the Left 4 Dead demo, and The Guild on DVD. And so here are a bunch or random thoughts I never got around to using for any other posts. Veteran's Day should be a national holiday, but only for Veteran's.  Everyone else has to work.  And bring us beer.  And naked women. Most people on the internet would rather eat a live baby than read an opinion they disagree with, even when it's just the set up to a joke. If you are a morbidly obese black man, you should not go out in public wearing a red sweater over a white collared shirt. If you are ... (Read More...) Posted in Just kind of babbling | 37 Comments » « Older Entries

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An

offbeat

list

of

forbidden

things

to

do

in

the

military.

http://www.skippyslist.com/

The 213 Things Skippy Is No Longer Allowed To Do In The U.S. Army 2008 November

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An offbeat list of forbidden things to do in the military.

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